In his latest column for leedsunited.com, lifelong supporter Jon Howe is dreaming, with the Whites just one point away from a top-flight return.
Howe is the author of two books on the club, 2015 hit ‘The Only Place For Us: An A-Z History of Elland Road’ and ‘All White: Leeds United’s 100 Greatest Players’ in 2012.
So here we are…….still dreaming. One point, one goal, whatever it takes and however it comes. Gone is the time to be choosy, to act out how we always imagined this would happen. Let’s just be thankful it’s close to happening. Indeed, it may already have happened by the time you read this. If that’s the case; how was it for you?
Whatever happens, let’s be grateful for an end to weeks, months and years of torment. We’ve been used to the season ending in early March, when all we had left to aim for was achieving a positive goal difference. We often failed. In 2020, the season ending in March had a whole new significance, and we had a whole new set of goals. And we had a lot of time to think about it, to ruminate the possibilities, to talk ourselves in and out of a state of confidence.
Since then we’ve spent endless sleepless nights analysing the league table in our heads, running through the permutations and the remaining fixtures. And in a post-lockdown world we can memorise the points tallies and goal difference of the top six and their respective run-ins, and yet we can’t remember the three items we were dispatched to Asda for. So we are left stranded in the freezer aisle staring blankly at bags of frozen peas, we are absorbed in thought as the world passes us by until we catch the eye of the checkout guy, because he looks a ‘bit’ like Marcelo Bielsa. And we are back in the room.
The apocalyptic wilderness of lockdown has done strange things to people, but fortunately it hasn’t changed Leeds United. And we wouldn’t want it to. Their rebellious nature will always confound and they have offered plenty of parting shots to a league that doesn’t want them to leave. Even the meddling of the fixture list to contrive the ultimate dramatic ending could well result in Leeds being promoted away from the theatrical glare of the cameras. Being forced to play after our nearest rivals each time has heaped pressure on us, but we have embraced it and responded. And the biggest irony is, not only have we not failed in the final straight like everyone hoped, but the ‘Hollywood’ moment this has all been leading up to, could now happen elsewhere.
That’s Leeds being ‘Leeds’ to the bitter end; defiant, non-conforming and devilishly playful. This is the wonderful contrariness of Leeds United not being pushed around and not playing ball. Circumstances have already robbed us of our perfect moment; there will be no explosion of collective joy, no slow-mo orchestration of a thousand wild eyes, no tumult and no confusion at an ecstatic and chaotic Elland Road. There will be no players held aloft by exhausted fans with pale and vacant rapture on their faces. There will be no hugging of strangers and congas leading up Lowfields Road. Instead we will be remote and distant, peering at a TV screen, dancing with the dog, hugging our nearest and dearest and toasting an empty night sky. It’s not a bad way to do it and it’s a fine substitute for the endless years of heartache, false dawns and experiencing nothing at all that raises the heart rate.
Of course, being stubborn and disobedient to the last, Leeds saved their strangest performance of the season for the one that put them on the precipice of greatness and legend. These players will forever be remembered for what they will surely now achieve, and we will always look at them differently to other mortals. But very little of that eminence and distinction was on display in a baffling 1-0 victory over bottom-placed Barnsley on Thursday evening.
As a contrast to the surety and authority Leeds have shown in much of the brave new world that is ‘Project Re-Start’, this game was a disorientating patchwork quilt of ragged unacquaintance. It was not so much “trust your swing”, more like “play left-handed and blind-fold and just muddle through the best you can”. Barnsley deserve some credit for that of course, but if we are dealing in golfing analogies here, Leeds certainly gave themselves a handicap.
But never dutiful and always a contradiction, it was perfectly ‘Leeds United’ to throw a Molotov Cocktail into the mix and create a chemical reaction. To think this would be a serene and idyllic stroll to promotion is to wildly underestimate Leeds United’s power to be the mutinous objector. And yet still we won, and in truth our post-lockdown record has been a largely seamless continuation of the majesty and superiority with which we have approached every game since the ‘Road to Damascus’ moment that we faced after losing 2-0 to Nottingham Forest in February.
In the 13 games since then Leeds have won ten, drawn two and lost one. With 23 goals scored and just four conceded, it is hard to understand why some fans remain engulfed in anxiety and anguish. It is the nature of football of course, and certainly the nature of being a Leeds United fan; a preference for the stony heart of fatalism rather than the cosy bosom of success. That comes from a long history of being dealt bad hands, and 16 years on the road to nowhere; when promotion can seem like a mirage that needs to be touched and felt before it can be accepted.
This is still a hill that Leeds need to get over. It has to be achieved. And then there will be no stopping Leeds United. Because the feverish delirium of fatalism delivers only unrelenting nightmares, and the nagging inevitability that ‘it’s happening again’. Once we are over that hill, our mind-set will change and we will be energised by the confidence that this team, this coach and this club should empower us with. The bare facts of the last 13 games tell us that. And I guess that means our nightmares should by now have already turned to dreams.
So here we are………..still dreaming. Still seeing eleven heroes in white, carrying the spirit of Norman, of Trevor and of Jack into battle and about to write themselves into Leeds United folklore. About to re-write some myths about this football club’s mentality and about to join some lofty and illustrious company. But most of all, about to give us deliverance.